Mother’s Milk

 I thought that I had it all. I thought that I was the happiest girl. My boyfriend was an amazing person and my best friend. We had a lot of fun together, traveling and spending time with our “baby” Cash, a Chesapeake Bay Retriever. We liked to spend our time at the beach and in the mountains. We camped in the summer and played in the snow in the winter. I felt amazing. I was beside myself with happiness.

For my birthday one year, Robert took me away for the weekend. We were staying at El Capitan Canyon and it was going to be a great weekend! On our first day there, we headed down to the beach for a “picnic”. Robert surprised me by getting down on one knee and proposing (He didn’t have the ring in his hand and since he is always joking around, I asked if he was kidding. I didn’t believe him until he pulled out the ring). That was in December of 2006. We knew exactly what we wanted for our wedding, so we began to plan right away. We knew we wanted something small and intimate and there was no question that we would get married at Convict Lake, that was our spot. Since it would be a Destination Wedding, we quickly booked the date and let our friends and family know so that they could ask for their vacation and book their cabins as soon as possible.

No sooner did we get everything settled and I found out that I was pregnant. What??? We were completely blown away, unprepared, FLABBERGASTED! I was so afraid that Robert would be upset, that our families would be upset. I felt that I had “ruined” our wedding. Luckily, all of my fear and worry was completely unfounded. Our families were thrilled with the news. And after the initial shock wore off (which quickly returned with the baby), Robert and I were very excited. Because everything was already settled with the wedding, we decided to leave the date as it was, eventhough that meant that I would be about eight months pregnant. We figured that it wouldn’t be too controversial since we were already engaged and in our thirties!

 Our wedding was PERFECT! It was an amazing four days with our closest friends and family. Everything went so smoothly. It was relaxing and beautiful. I will be honest, part of my was a little sad that I didn’t get to partake in all of the festivities, but everytime I felt that way I would get a little kick to my ribs and I would know it was worth it.

Considering my condition, our Tahitian honeymoon was out of the picture. Instead we opted to take a lovely driving tour of California. We ended up having a great time and even scoped out some spots that we would like to return to as a family.

It was so nice to get that time together in. We knew that our life would be changing, but we had no idea how much. I was lucky enough to take off the entire last month of my pregnancy. While I did spend some time preparing for the baby, the majority of my time was spent bonding with Cash and indulging myself. It was important for me to give Cash as much attention as possible, as I knew that for the next few months, I wouldn’t have much extra time for him. I indulged myself by doing a lot of things that I didn’t think I would have time to do after the baby came. There was a lot of reading, a lot of movie-going, and a few massages thrown in. I was feeling pretty high on the bliss meter.

After a scary labor and delivery, I finally had my baby. I was more in love with him than I ever could have imagined. I thought that I was happy and content before, but it was miniscule compared to the happiness I was now feeling (and would continue to feel). As much of a planner and preparer that I am, I was completely unprepared for the emotions, the work and the complete change that this little guy would bring me. I love every minute of it! It is the biggest adventure of my life and I can’t wait to give you a glimpse of it all!